Last night as we crawled into bed together, my husband said something.
“It’s nice to be able to cuddle with you again.”
For over two weeks, we had barely see one another. First because I was quarantined in the bedroom with illness before the holidays. Next, because he was. Then we spent four days visiting family, where the sleeping arrangements always put me cuddling with the kiddo on a twin mattress and him on a different twin bed.
He was right. We went 12 days without really talking to each other. I felt it.
The things that had been bothering me, we didn’t talk about. We made big decisions about our future without really talking about them or praying about them during that time, too. To top it all off, we went two weeks without going to church together on Sunday mornings and Wednesday nights because of everything.
Right smack dab in the middle of it all, I lost it.
Standing in the middle of the hallway the day before we left for our road trip, my emotions ran down my face. A mixture of fear over the future, anger over where we were, and stress over things that didn’t need to be stressed about boiled over. I said things in ways I shouldn’t have said them.
He asked me to come talk about them. I said, “I don’t want to right now.”
The truth was, I felt lost and alone.
As I read the “I Do Every Day” Devotional this morning these words popped off the page, “If my wife and I go a day without talking over a cup of coffee or taking a walk around the neighborhood, we feel it. Our patience wears thin, our tones get harsh, and bickering over small things increases. We’re not alone. The drift from order to chaos is the natural way of the universe. Over time, the chaos in your relationship will increase. You will grow apart from your spouse. The family harmony you once had will be lost. Unless you actively and intentionally fight against it.”
Ecclesiastes 4:12 reminds us, “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”
As we crawled into bed last night, our daughter helped us put the third strand back into our cord.
“Daddy, do you have a devotional you can read me over the walk-in talkie?” her sweet voice asked.
He picked up the book, and just like that, we were back to being intentional as a family about growing together with Christ at the center of our relationship. And we are back as a couple working on intentionally making time to know each other.
God designed marriage to be a safe place for you to grow together in oneness with your spouse. Satan uses everything he can to destroy that.
If you’re looking for a way to improve your communication with your spouse in 2023, it’s not too late to register for ReEngage | Enrich Your Marriage at Trinity Baptist Church. The class starts Sunday, January 15th. It gives you a 16 week road map and the tools you need to build intentionality into your marriage so you can overcome the chaos and challenges life throws at you.
Learn more at TrinityTXK.com/ReEngage